Round That Boy Up

Tomorrow Sam and I are going to the Kindergarten Round-Up to get Noah and Andi all signed up for school this fall.

Here, let me finish that thought for you, "Wait! What?! Noah is what? Now when was he...? Holy cow! His parents don't seem nearly old enough to...! Wow!"

Father-Sons Campout

Once again I forgot to bring a camera to the annual Father-Sons Campout. Sorry everyone. But I do have stories, if that helps. This year the campout was at Lake Tawakoni State Park. If it sounds familiar, maybe you remember the spiderwebs. The spiders weren't too bad while we were there, so I'll carry on.

Noah was very excited to go camping. He had been talking about it for days, counting down until it was time to go. We got lucky, as we got to camp right near Noah's friends, Joey and Joel. They got to play a bit together that evening. Noah got to have "s'mores," though he called them snores the whole time. I put s'mores in double quotes because Noah would only eat them if you used a marshmallow straight from the bag. I roasted one for him at first, and he didn't like it being squishy. Whatever, man.

The next day we did quite a bit of hiking on the trails near the campsite. Noah thought it was pretty fun, though he hated the muddy parts. There were quite a few of them, as it had rained quite a bit the week before. At the end of the hike, he was complaining loudly about how the map had taken us through "Mud Forest." He was a good hiker though, we hiked some pretty good distances, and he did a good job of following me to avoid the muddiest stuff.

Noah was definitely a good sport and we had a fun time together. Next year we'll bring Tate along, too. (Hopefully with a camera.)

Boys Are Still Gross

I sat all the kids down to cut their nails today and, as has been the case lately, when I got to Noah's fingers there wasn't a whole lot of nail left for me to cut. Apparently Noah isn't getting enough to eat around here and he feels the need to snack on his fingernails every once in a while. I know what you're thinking, EWWWWW! I gave him the usual talk about how there were germs...and it was really gross...and he really needed to stop. Then I looked at his toenails, which looked fine and unchewed, and since his foot was right there I held him down and tickled his feet for a minute. Then, mid-laugh, he started screaming, "Stop! Stop! I didn't eat my toes Mom! I can't reach them!"

Our Little Psychic

We started watching the beginning of the Super Bowl tonight, though we don't really have any emotional investment in who would win. Since we didn't really care, I asked Noah who he wanted to win. He told me he wanted the guys in the blue helmets to win (NY Giants) and I asked him why. "Because I like their helmets," was his response. "Why do you like their helmets?" "Because they're the team that's going to win!" "That's a little circular, but whatever."

I should have asked him what the score was going to be.

This Tastes Like...Burning

Noah got a small bag of candy at a birthday party this last weekend and I have been letting him have a few pieces a day since then. I left it on the counter this afternoon and Noah, being the little bandit that he is lately, snuck a piece.

I came into the kitchen and he was making this horrible, sad face clutching a small piece of cellophane wrapping. He'd chosen an Atomic Fireball. I asked him if he had helped himself to some candy and he made a sad noise and nodded his head up and down. "Is it burning your mouth?" Same noise, same nod. "Do you want to spit it out?" He promptly spit it into his hand and tried to hand the nasty, mouth burning thing to me. "No way man. I don't want that thing. Put it in the sink."

Noah 4

17 And I, Dad, said unto Noah: Hast thou eaten of the chocolate chunk cookies whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldst not eat, if so thou shouldst surely get in trouble?

18 And Noah said: The sister thou gavest me, and commandest that she should be a playmate unto me, she gave me of the cookies on the table and I did eat.

19 And I, Dad, said unto Tess: What is this thing which thou hast done? And Tess said: You were napping, and I did eat.

20 And I, Dad, said unto my children: Because thou hast done this thou shalt have no cookies after dinner; thou shalt go swiftly to bed once dinner is finished.

What the Future Holds

Noah: I'm gonna have 19 kids.

Mom: Really? Did you tell Daddy?

Daddy: I heard him. 19, huh?

N: Yeah.

D: What are you going to do with those 19 kids?

N: I'm gonna deal with them.

D: What are you going to do with them when they are naughty?

N: Put them in jail.

D: What else?

N: Put them in the car and leave them there for a long time. (Noah's parents would like it to be known that they have never done or threatened this.)

D: Anything else?

N: Wash their mouths out with soap. (We've never done that either.)

D: What about when they are good.

N: Let them clean up. Only if there is a little mess. And give them a dollar. From all of my dollars.

D: How are you going to get all of those dollars?

N: From the bank.

M: Great.

D: What are you going to do for a job?

N: Going to go get money from the banks. (We've done this on occasion but it was much more legal than what Noah has in mind.)

M: Well at least you'll have an in when you need to send your kids to jail.

D: How are you going to help them if they have homework?

N: Go to the store. And buy potatoes and strawberries to make chocolate cake.

M: Do your homework or you have to eat this cake!

N: And some matches to light it on fire.

M: Oooh! Do your homework or you'll have to eat this flaming potato-strawberry-chocolate cake!

D: Oh I get it! It's like a baked Canada!

M: It's Alaska honey.

N: And the mom won't talk on the phone. (Noah was mad after I made him be quiet while I was on the phone earlier, I'm guessing that's where this is coming from...)

D: Your wife can't talk on the phone?

M: You do know that's not how you got those 19 kids, don't you?

N: And all the brothers will be named Jason.

D: What about the sisters?

N: Katie!

Looks pretty bright don't you think?

I Just Love 4-year Olds

There are a few presents for the kids under our Christmas Tree already. I imagine that if they knew that all those boxes were full of the clothes that Jared and I got them they'd be a little less excited to open them, but oh well. I told Noah the other day that if he didn't start doing something or maybe it was stop doing something then Santa wasn't going to bring him any presents and he and I launch a really mature conversation that went something like this:

Noah: Santa will bring me presents! You don't know Santa.

Mom: Noah, I not only know Santa I have been to the North Pole and if you don't knock it off I am going to take all of your presents back to Santa myself.

N: Mom! You can't take my presents!

M: That's it! Where are my keys?

N: No! You can't go to the north pole in our car Mom...

M: Oh yeah? Why not?

N: Because, Mom. Our car doesn't fly.

Breakfast Cereal Blues

I've been throwing away a lot of cereal lately since Noah keeps deciding it tastes yucky. You'd think he'd learn to pick different cereal but he insists on the same bag of frosted flakes every morning. I told him this morning that I was tired of throwing away full bowls of cereal so he'd be sitting there until that bowl was gone. He told me he was "Not going to eat it today Mom" and I told him that was fine. He could have it tomorrow. "But Mom, it'll be yucky tomorrow." "Well then eat it today." I just love arguing with four year olds...

He plopped himself back down and started playing with the little blue chair that was next to the table. I removed the blue chair from the room and helped him turn around so he could keep not eating his cereal. Of course he broke into tears, and then Jared broke into song..."There's a tear in my cereal 'cause she spanked me..." Noah kept crying, of course, so Jared kept singing, "I should have eaten when it was given to me. It's a decision that I now regret." Geez I would kill to have a dull moment around here...

Lunch and Geometry

While Noah was having lunch today he picked up a Cheez-It cracker and bit all four corners off of it and then said, "Look Mom! I made an octagon!"